Welcome to a new Sitcom Tuesday! This week, we’re continuing our coverage of Two And A Half Men (2003-2015, CBS), which is currently available on DVD and Peacock!

Two And A Half Men stars JON CRYER as Alan, ASHTON KUTCHER as Walden, and ANGUS T. JONES as Jake. With CONCHATA FERRELL as Berta, COURTNEY-THORNE SMITH as Lyndsey, SOPHIE WINKLEMAN as Zoey, and HOLLAND TAYLOR as Evelyn.

Sadly, Charlie is dead but Two And A Half Men isn’t. These final four seasons are bad — not only because the show has already fallen prey to trends that have eroded its quality (like a broad, hyper-sexuality that’s so extreme it no longer feels attached to the characters), but also because, well, the whole situation is upended and no longer makes sense. Yes, Charlie’s successor Walden, played by Ashton Kutcher, helps Men maintain its “buddy comedy” setup, along with the rom-com storytelling that continues to dominate (making little use of character though, as usual). But the entire “bachelor uncle” or parenting angle is gone, as is that initial dramatic weight. What’s more, the bonds between the leads are weaker — both with Jake and Walden, who barely interact (thus undermining the Two And A Half Men title), and even Alan and Walden, who have no supportive history. So, it’s hard to find ideas that feature the premise well now, for the premise itself is unwell. Okay, Cryer and Kutcher have decent chemistry, and actually, Walden gets a smart introduction: he’s a seemingly perfect billionaire who has natural appeal with women, even though he’s inexperienced, as he’s still pining for the estranged wife who dumped him (like Alan was in the pilot). Also, while brilliant, he is naive and immature — an overgrown child. That gives him a way to be funny in story, and it contrasts well with Alan, who can still be a comparable loser but now the older and “wiser” figure as well. Unfortunately, all this definition for Walden fades out by Nine’s midpoint, leaving only his billionaire status as a hook. For the rest of the year, he’s placed in trite rom-com stories involving his ex-wife (Judy Greer) and a British woman named Zoey (Sophie Winkleman), whose basic personality is… um, she’s British. Oh, I suppose she’s a bit haughty, but the point is she’s not funny and can’t make the plotting unique. This, of course, yields terrible sitcommery — and it’s a waste of Walden’s early potential. As for Alan, Walden’s dilution accelerates his heightening — specifically the fact that he’s a mega-mooch, something the show must SHOUT about now that he and the other co-lead have no familial tie to justify the living arrangement. And as this strains credulity, the raunch soars, rendering Men a show whose crassness seems to exist due to the absence of anything else. Nine is the point of no return, so it’s only going to get worse from here…

 

01) Episode 178: “Nice To Meet You, Walden Schmidt” (Aired: 09/19/11)

Alan meets a distraught billionaire.

Written by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn & Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson | Directed by James Widdoes

The final era of Two And A Half Men begins with a bit of promise, as this premiere not only treats the death of Charlie with a lightness that’s actually less crude than expected (by this show’s standards, that is), but it also capably introduces Walden as described above: he’s a charming billionaire who’s a natural with the ladies, although relatively unexperienced and fairly naive. And with a seemingly strong characterization, plus some decent initial chemistry between the two guys, Men’s changed and obviously weaker situation nevertheless looks like it may have some character support to not be so awful; alas… (This is a guest star-laden show too — lots of Charlie’s exes make cameos, along with John Stamos, and the two leads from Dharma & Greg in a winking reference to that earlier Chuck Lorre series. Martin Mull also appears.)

02) Episode 179: “People Who Love Peepholes” (Aired: 09/26/11)

Walden brings Alan to visit his ex-wife.

Written by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn & Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson | Directed by James Widdoes

Walden’s sophomore episode follows the above’s “to be continued” and it’s part of the year’s opening tetralogy that establishes everything we need to know about this new character, while also creating a new status quo that gets Alan and Jake firmly back in the Malibu house, which Walden now owns. As for this entry, it’s not one of this list’s choicest, but I think it’s a seminal step in establishing the idea that Walden is an immature child — the very reason for his forthcoming divorce and a recurring comedic trait, which should theoretically yield both laughs and story that feel apropos within Men’s extra silly, often crass sensibility.

03) Episode 184: “Those Fancy Japanese Toilets” (Aired: 10/31/11)

Evelyn helps Walden redecorate the house while Alan reads Charlie’s diary.

Teleplay by Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson | Story by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn | Directed by James Widdoes

There’s a lot of solid character and relationship-building in this outing, specifically in relation to Walden, as Evelyn helps him plan the redecoration of his Malibu house (a way for Men to visually break from Charlie and reinforce the Walden characterization in design), before she seduces him — one more notch on the show’s figurative bed post, and a reminder of the hyper-sexuality that’s now defining the series. Meanwhile, Jake learns that Walden is a good fluffier, given his attractiveness to women. As for Alan, he is awarded another shockingly sincere chance to mourn Charlie — a display of continuity for which Lorre and Men must be commended, as it’s not yet self-negatingly regarding this important aspect of the old situation as a cheap joke…

04) Episode 185: “Thank You For The Intercourse” (Aired: 11/07/11)

Alan mourns Charlie by adopting his persona.

Teleplay by Lee Aronsohn & Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson | Story by Chuck Lorre & Susan McMartin | Directed by James Widdoes

My pick for this season’s Most Valuable Episode (MVE), “Thank You For The Intercourse” is the most revealing and yet enjoyable sample from the otherwise subpar Nine, with stories for both Walden and Alan that indicate where their characterizations stand right now in this transitional period. The main focus is Alan, who is still mourning Charlie’s passing and comes to adopt his persona, both when interacting with the other leads and picking up women. It’s a variation of last season’s entry where he pretended to be Charlie, only here, there’s an enhanced gravitas due to the latter’s “passing.” Once again though, it’s symbolic of his trajectory on the series itself, as Alan has come to occupy the space that initially belonged to Charlie — both in relation now to Walden, but also, in general, as Men’s primary comedic force. At the same time, Walden starts enjoying casual sex — something to which he’s been heretofore unaccustomed. This is an initiation into the show’s horny and bed-hopping stylings that reminds us of his intended persona… but also suggests that it’s changing. And indeed, it is… evaporating, in fact… So, this is easily the best, most honest character showing of the season.

05) Episode 186: “Frodo’s Headshots” (Aired: 11/14/11)

Alan finds his life crumbling around him.

Teleplay by Susan Beavers & David Richardson & Don Reo | Story by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn | Directed by James Widdoes

Picking up from the previous, this notable excursion is a showcase for Jon Cryer, who won another Emmy this year — his first time in the Leading Actor category, an indication of how Charlie’s absence has formally elevated his standing, both in the series and in the industry’s perception of it. Now, truthfully, I don’t love this story, because it’s all revealed to be a nightmare, rendering it a gimmick — the kind Men has mostly avoided so far but will continue to engage more often as the run progresses. However, it’s got a character-based excuse for the stunt, and in this half hour where Alan’s world crashes down from every side, we really see how the show intends to use him going forward — as the central figure. (Gary Busey appears.)

06) Episode 190: “Slowly And In A Circular Fashion” (Aired: 01/02/12)

Walden adds Alan to the board of his company.

Teleplay by Lee Aronsohn & Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson | Story by Chuck Lorre & Ashton Kutcher | Directed by James Widdoes

One of the most memorable episodes from the Walden era, this amusing installment utilizes his status as a billionaire while also involving his relationships with other recurring players — including his ex-wife (Judy Greer) and mother (Mimi Rogers). His bonds with both ostensibly reveal to us things about his character, and this is welcome, because his definition is actively dissolving in real time… leaving nothing but his wealth as a reminder. This outing has sort of a ridiculous, high-concept plot, but with this aforementioned relationship-based support, particularly via some building of the Alan/Walden friendship that is necessary for the maintenance of the season’s weak situation, I consider this a key Walden showing.

07) Episode 195: “The War Against Gingivitis” (Aired: 02/27/12)

Walden’s ex-business partner and former best friend returns with an idea.

Teleplay by Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson & Don Reo | Story by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn | Directed by James Widdoes

Patton Oswalt debuts in this offering in the recurring role of Walden’s former best friend and business partner, who ends up reentering his life and resuming their professional bond. As before, I appreciate when we meet people with whom Walden has a history because it adds to our understanding of his character, even though all that’s basically being used in story right now — outside of the rom-com stuff I’m mostly avoiding — is the fact that he’s a billionaire techie… And yet, beggars can’t be choosers at this point in Men’s run, and since this is a memorable entry that only exists with Walden, I have to highlight it here.

08) Episode 196: “Palmdale, Ech” (Aired: 03/19/12)

Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers to each other.

Teleplay by Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson & Don Reo | Story by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn | Directed by James Widdoes

Georgia Engel makes her first of two consecutive appearances here as Lyndsey’s mother, an apparently conservative woman who nevertheless has a knack for insulting people. It’s fun to see her paired with Holland Taylor’s Evelyn — a friendship that naturally turns into a sexual tryst, in evidence of the series’ comic identity, which revels not only in the promiscuity, but in the sheer audaciousness of using someone like Engel in such a naughty way. As with much of Nine, this is not great sitcommery, but it stands out in large part because of the casting and how she’s deployed to reinforce the series’ ethos. Meanwhile, Walden hangs out with Jake and Eldridge — a rare instance of the new man bonding with the “half man,” acknowledging the premise.

09) Episode 199: “Why We Gave Up Women” (Aired: 04/30/12)

Alan has a heart attack and is visited by Charlie’s ghost.

Teleplay by Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson & Don Reo | Story by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn | Directed by James Widdoes

This atypical offering boasts another casting stunt, as the funny Kathy Bates appears to Alan as Charlie’s ghost, risen from Hell to speak to him. It’s a hysterical way to continue exploring Alan and his ongoing feelings about his brother while also winking about the off-camera brouhaha that prevents Sheen from ever actually appearing again. Such meta-comedy will only grow in prominence from here on out, and it’ll have less of a sincere foundation for story than there is in this entry, where Alan has a heart attack and the show intends to treat the development earnestly (but with the expected number of laughs, of course). Gimmicky, but a real highlight.

10) Episode 200: “The Straw In My Donut Hole” (Aired: 05/07/12)

Alan takes advantage of everyone’s kindness after his heart attack.

Teleplay by Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn & Susan Beavers | Story by Eddie Gorodetsky & Jim Patterson & Don Reo | Directed by James Widdoes

Alan returns home from the hospital in this outing, which really emphasizes his growing reputation for being a leech on others — someone who has no intentions of ever getting his own place, because he can just mooch off his family and friends. Frankly, this was always true during Charlie’s era, but it gets exaggerated in the Walden years out of necessity, for there’s no other logical reason for he and Jake to still be living in that Malibu house. That’s why I spotlight this offering — it’s clichéd and narratively unoriginal, but it represents an important progression of his character. Oh, and Jason Alexander has a fun guest appearance.

 

Other notable episodes that merit mention include: “Sips, Sonnets, And Sodomy,” a bottle show where the love interests feud — it’s pretty generic, but I at least appreciate that Zoey is defined as a sort of elitist, while Lyndsey is the opposite, and “A Giant Cat Holding A Churro,” where Walden gets high on Berta’s brownies and his character starts to inch closer to the real-life Ashton Kutcher, along with “The Squat And The Hover,” where Walden visits Charlie’s old shrink (Jane Lynch), “One False Move, Zimbabwe!,” which reveals more about Walden by having us meet his mom, “Grandma’s Pie,” which follows Evelyn’s new romance with Lyndsey’s mom, and “Mr. Hose Says ‘Yes,'” where Jon Cryer’s Alan gets to do some physical comedy and Walden has an A-story that finds him being an inexperienced proxy parent.

 

*** The MVE Award for the Best Episode from Season Nine of Two And A Half Men goes to…

“Thank You For The Intercourse” 

 

 

Come back next week for Season Ten! And stay tuned for a new Wildcard Wednesday!